The Things You Said

The Things You Said

 

“Can’t you just forget about it?”

“You deserved it.”

“Did you have sex with him before?”

“Did you ever want to?”

“Maybe you misunderstood what was happening.”

“Some kids just like to experiment with each other, sexually, that’s all.”

“You’re blowing this out of proportion.”

“You have to put this behind you; you’re doing this to yourself.”

“You should forgive him, you know, for closure.”

“What were you wearing?”

“You’re not a real victim.”

“You’re not enough of a victim for it to matter.”

“Are you sure you didn’t lead him on?”

“Why did you give him your number?”

“How can you get raped more than once?”

“It’s not rape if he put it in your mouth.”

“Just chalk it up to bad sex.”

“Why are you so sensitive?”

“Well, if I had been there, it probably wouldn’t have happened.”

“Hurt people hurt people, too.”

“Why all the comments about rape, you’re so hateful.”

“You need to learn to move on, like he did.”

“But you made breakfast for him the next morning.”

“He said you smiled at him, though.”

“But you said you liked it rough.”

“How many boyfriends have you had?”

“How can you say you’re a rape victim and still have casual sex?”

“You cause pain to everyone who cares about you.”

“Life goes on, you have to go with it.”

“We can’t punish him for making some bad decisions.”

“He should get the chance to learn from this.”

“You must have some really bad karma from a past life.”

“Why are you still upset?”

“All you ever do is push people away.”

“In X years, you really won’t care about this.”

“He said it was a mistake, people make mistakes.”

“Surviving this made you brave.”

“You just need medication.”

“He said that you wanted it because you kissed him first.”

“Did you explicitly say no?”

“You were asking for it.”

“Did you say anything back?”

“Your dress was really short.”

“Did you push him back?”

“How loudly did you say ‘no’?”

“Did you always like to wear such high heels?”

“You need to put a positive spin on this. You could be inspiring!”

“Do you have any pictures of yourself from that night?”

“He has pictures of you on his profile; you look happy.”

“How could he know you didn’t want it when you were just lying there?”

“I voted for him because he’s good for the economy.”

“Women’s rights are not a federal issue.”

“You have always been so negative!”

“I’ve had some really hard breakups, too.”

“You are unlovable.”

“If you want my support, this is what you have to do to get it.”

“If you talk about it so much, you’ll never heal.”

“Have you ever been drunk before?”

“But you look normal!”

“You just have to make peace with it.”

“You’re going to be fine.”

“Just ignore it, that’s just how men are.”

“You’re a man hater!”

“Just enjoy it.”

“I think you like to put yourself in dangerous situations.”

“You seek this kind of thing out.”

“I think you feel comfortable with being unsafe.”

“Well I’m ready to listen to you now, why don’t you want to talk about it?”

“Have you ever worn short shorts before?”

“But you didn’t wear a bra!”

“What happened to you is not my responsibility.”

“It disturbs me to read about what you say happened to you. Please stop.”

“Where’s the evidence?”

“But he was so nice to everyone else!”

“You know, boys will be boys!”

“They’re all like that when they’re younger; so horny and stuff.”

“Men have urges, sometimes.”

“It doesn’t sound like a bad rape.”

“If this were true, you would have reported it.”

“Well I would never allow this to happen to me!”

“No one will believe you, anyway.”

“You’re making my life harder.”

“Why’d you stay with him?”

“You owed it to me.”

“If it really happened, why didn’t you say anything?”

“He just couldn’t help himself.”

“Are you sure you’re not just remembering events that benefit you?”

“If you can’t remember the date and time, it didn’t happen.”

“You’re just making all this up.”

“His friends say that you wanted it.”

“But you said you loved him?”

“Why won’t you name them then?”

“Boys and girls cannot just be friends.”

“You should have known better.”

“You shouldn’t have trusted him.”

“Why did you go with him?”

“Did you expect him to read your mind?”

“Why did you cover up the marks, then?”

“He’s probably learned from this and so should you.”

“Don’t drag his life down along with yours.”

“You’re a pretty girl, it’s to be expected.”

“Apparently you had more friends that were boys than girls.”

“What are your sexual tastes?”

“Everyone would be so much happier without you.”

“How many times have you gone on dates?”

“You can’t get PTSD from having sex!”

“You’re just one of those people that these things happen to.”

“You make everyone around you so uncomfortable.”

“Are you sure that this isn’t just your depression talking?”

“Don’t be so selfish.”

“You’re the narcissist!”

“You’re the abusive one!”

“You’re a mean, hateful bitch.”

“Our family has suffered because of this.”

“You can’t be trusted to do anything if you let this happen to you.”

“You are a disgrace.”

“Whatever happened to you, happened just to you.”

“This was such a long time ago, jeez!”

“Everyone’s just trying to do their best, cut them some slack.”

“Well what did you do that made him do it?”

“You played your part in this, too.”

“He said you seemed into it at first.”

“Well I was assaulted and I don’t tell everyone about it!”

“You should have killed yourself.”

“You should be ashamed of yourself.”

“You have done nothing but hurt us with your lies.”

“You have humiliated me.”

“This must have been God’s will.”

“God has a plan.”

“You needed to be taught a lesson.”

“You needed this to make you a stronger person.”

“You needed this to prepare you for the real world.”

“You’re an attention-seeker.”

“But he says he loves you.”

“You’re not capable of making good decisions for yourself.”

“So can you tell me what exactly you didn’t like about it?”

“At least you seem more aware of yourself now.”

“It will all be okay!”

“You’re choosing to be a victim.”

“You’re stronger than this, c’mon, this is getting old.”

“Stop letting it get to you!”

“Stop letting it define you, you are choosing to do this.”

“Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!”

“It’s not like he put a gun to your head.”

“Well at least he didn’t pull the trigger!”

“You’re so self-centered.”

“Just stop talking about it, I hate seeing this on my newsfeed.”

“This is depressing, can you just talk about something else?”

“Other people have survived worse than you.”

“Just get over it.”

“You’re making this into a huge deal.”

“It happened years ago.”

“You’re weak.”

“No one cares.”

“Things are hard enough without you waving your victim-flag.”

“Why are you just now speaking about it?”

“I heard you had anorexia in High-School.”

“If it didn’t go to trial, it’s because they know you’re not telling the whole story.”

“You are disturbed.”

“I think you just like the attention.”

“Women can be rapists too!”

“Innocent until proven guilty!”

“It takes two to tango.”

“Well why didn’t you report it then?”

“Why didn’t you fight back harder?”

“Why didn’t you take more self-defense classes?”

“Have you ever slept naked before?”

“Why did you let him sleep in your bed?”

“Why is this so important to you?”

“How many people have you slept with?”

“I heard you liked it rough.”

“Everyone laughs about you.”

“Maybe you should have compromised with him.”

“You are an embarrassment to us.”

“You didn’t try hard enough to make things work.”

“You’ve accomplished nothing in your life.”

“What did you expect, you’ve posted pictures of yourself in a bikini!”

“Why would he rape you though, there are much prettier girls than you.”

“He’s probably scared that you’re going to ruin his life.”

“You got all those tattoos to draw attention to yourself.”

“Stop having a public pity party on social media.”

“If your mom, the psychiatrist, doesn’t believe you, how could anyone?”

“Were you jealous that he made better grades than you?”

“Everyone remembers you as being sad all the time.”

“Only selfish people want to kill themselves.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be friendly to people you don’t know.”

“Maybe you should have been nicer to him.”

“It is scary, as a man, to read that you called someone a rapist in public.”

“Well it’s not like you’ve been in the army or anything.”

“You weren’t strong enough.”

“Are you sure you don’t just have social anxiety?”

“You’re choosing to have flashbacks.”

“It can’t be rape if you’ve had sex with him before.”

“Men have to be so careful now with girls, because of girls like you.”

“Just relax!”

“Well, I’M not afraid to walk alone at night!”

“Just take it as a compliment.”

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